I don't live my dream life yet

“When I grow up, I’ll be a magician.” This is a sentence children probably say sometimes – at least I did when I swung my ‘wand’, a gnawed-on pencil, at my dad and cursed him to be a frog. Dreaming to be able to cast spells and live in a magical castle is nothing far-fetched. Even today, I am transporting myself to magical worlds through stories, books, series and games. As a child, it was easier to stay in these worlds and not let reality tear it apart, as reality was not as burdensome and worrying as it can be as an adult. Instead of being the apprentice of an old witch in the woods, I have to work an actual job – and it was during a never-ending shift that I realised that I don’t live my dream life yet. Let me explain why this thought has some issues. 

First of all: what is my dream life? For quite a while, I have been dreaming of a simple life as an author somewhere in Scandinavia in a cosy, wooden cabin. I am surrounded by dense forests and mystical mountains and therefore, I am able to connect with nature on a deeper level. Plus, I would like to live as sustainably as possible by growing my own food and reduce my environmental impact.

The first issue is that I connect my dream life to a place. I assume that I can be truly happy when moving to this certain cabin. Will everything be perfect then? Of course not. If there is one thing I have learned in my young life, it’s that happiness mainly comes from within. Naturally, external factors like a non-fulfilling job can have a great impact on our well-being, and for me, living in a place with eternal summer would feel like a punishment (some consider me strange). But: it is us who decide what to make of our given conditions. It is us who decide to be happy, or more accurately: satisfied. Right now. I may not live in Scandinavia, nor in a wooden cabin. But there is time to get to this place which may never be Scandinavia. Life has this habit of surprising us, whether we like it or not. Our task is to appreciate the effort we invested into reaching our current step in life and slowly, but steadily, work towards our dreams.

Believe me, it is easier said than done. I found comfort in the thought that my journey has not reached its end. If I’m still figuring out how to navigate through life, that is completely fine. We are life-long learners and will always stumble upon an issue we have no answer for yet. A stoic wisdom says that everything we encounter on our path becomes the path. We might find a way to go around it for some time, but it will catch up to us. Imagine the issue to be a relationship we cling to while knowing its harmful impact on us, or a deep-seated wound from our childhood we often tear open but don’t allow to heal by avoiding it. Healing takes time and effort. We could live in our dream location with all the cosiness imaginable, but we would still be in pain internally.

Also, in my opinion, happiness is a state while satisfaction is a lifestyle. I believe that you can be in pain while satisfied. It is accepting that not everything must be perfect that brings us satisfaction and peace. Perfection is a dangerous illusion: whoever strives for it is filling a bottomless cup. I remember a conversation with a friend who had been travelling through Iceland during that time. She was shocked by the beauty of Iceland’s nature and mentioned heavy rainfall during a trip. Some might believe that rain spoils nature’s beauty, but my friend explained it with nature trying to maintain balance. Without rain, we would be lured into thinking that nature’s beauty is untouchable and perfect – which is not the case, of course. Just as we humans, nature cries and bleeds, and just as nature, we are all seasons.

Everything what has happened until now was necessary to shape me into the person I am today. A person who has gained strength and self-confidence through positive and negative experiences. Who has cried and laughed and everything else. I know being human can be hard, but, as Norwegian singer-songwriter Aurora said on one of her concerts (and I was there!): we don’t have to justify that we exist. Everything you can do is do your best, and this will always be enough.

How does your dream life look like? Is it connected to a certain place or have you already found such a place within yourself? I would love to read your comment! Don’t forget to come over to Instagram.

Stay curious,

Sara